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Working My Way Through A Day of Not-So-Pleasant Experiences at the Gym

OK, so in my usual fashion of not announcing my goals until I have some hope of actually achieving them (see my DIY for Feralicious, for instance), last week I set a goal for myself to get some form of exercise EVERY DAY in April.  Not every other day, not just when I feel like it, but EVERY DAY, no excuses.  Of course, I didn't set this goal until April 2, so I am one day behind (sort of-- I plan to rectify this with a double up workout during Million Minute Month, but anyway . . .), but I am also conveniently now using this goal as training for the MMM, when I am considering setting another goal for myself of 2000 minutes (that's 66 minutes a day) of exercise for the length of the challenge.  Not so impossible when you consider that most of my yoga classes are 1.5 hours long.

Anyway, as a part of my current goal, I am also checking out new classes at Equinox that have intrigued me in the past in an attempt to get more cardio into the mix.  Today, it was a class called Willpower and Grace that has this delightfully frothy description in the class listing.  And can I just say: UGH.

Now mind you, since I am not a quitter, I did not walk out of this class, though lots of people did-- it was THAT bad.  It was also the kind of class that exemplifies why training of instructors is so critical.  I was watching the form of the instructor, and maybe it's just me as someone who has training to teach yoga in a yogic discipline that is VERY alignment based, but her form was entirely out of whack, and some of what she was doing was very dangerous, not only to herself but to the students.  I don't know, maybe I have become some kind of snob, but I really could not believe that THIS is what Equinox has on offer right now.  And then, when people starting walking out, she started yelling at the students who were left in the class about why so many people were leaving, and how she just "couldn't believe it!"  When one guy tried to leave with five minutes left, she actually threw a mat down in front of him and said "No!  We are going to stretch!"  Unbelievable.  So that was not-so-pleasant revelation #1: a bad class can ruin your day (I had this exact thought in the middle), and some teachers just really flat-out suck.  Contemplation from this: I may be better suited to just sticking with Anusara yoga and the occasional hard-core cardio session, a la spinning, running, or cardio weight training at home.

But the second and third revelations were, if you can believe it, rather worse.  Since I have been doing basically nothing but yoga and cardio-weight work at home for the last seven years or so, it's been a long time since I've been in a studio or taken a class where there's a mirror.  Now, before I get to this revelation, I want to note that I am turning 39 in a little less than three weeks and it's the first birthday that's really chapped my ass, so I'm a little sensitive at the moment, but I swear (not-so-pleasant revelation #2) that I looked in the mirror today and saw my mother's tummy and thighs.  I am not overweight, and quite unlike my mother, have never had any kind of weight problem, but things seem to have, um, rearranged themselves a little bit in the last six months or so.  Once I realized this, it took all my willpower to not run screaming from the room, with its torturously painful wall of mirrors.  Sigh.  Contemplation from this: there is no time like the present to stick with this plan of getting exercise every single day.  Oh, the horror.

Third revelation, which I imagine is somewhat related, concerns how people are dressing at Equinox these days.  I swung by the shop on the way in, and seriously people, they are selling a $375 GYM BAG.  There are workout clothes in there in the hundreds of dollars.  This was shocking to me, given that it's been awhile since I updated my workout wardrobe, but worse was the after-effect, when I saw what I was wearing in the heretofore mentioned floor-to-ceiling mirrors of shame and horror (i.e., ratty yoga top washed approximately 337 times and my usual Beyond Yoga yoga pants), next to virtually every other member of the class, all totally decked out in shiny new workout gear. 

And so, I reach this question: how is it that I walked into the gym today feeling pretty ok about myself, and walked out feeling decidedly non-sexy and entirely out of fashion?!  And this for someone who has always been known (until, like, a year ago, when my salary got cut and I had to give up any kind of extraneous spending) as someone who always looked well-put-together, cutting edge and fit as a fiddle?!  ARGH!

My contemplation from this, however, became an actual goal on the way back to the office:  I am going through my closets, possibly as soon as tonight, and throwing out/donating every single item of clothing that doesn't make me feel sexy when I wear it.  If I am going to soon be 39, then goddamn it, I am going to hit that birthday looking awesome and feeling awesome and working my ass off to be more fit than I ever have been in my life.  Life is too bloody short to walk through it not feeling like a hot tamale.  It's time for me to SHAKE IT UP A LITTLE!  And I have no doubt my husband will appreciate my efforts.  ;)

OK, end of self-pep-talk.  UGH, what a lunchtime experience.  Workout log for today: Abs Class, Willpower and Grace class, total workout time 1.5 hours.  Sigh.