Workout
what's most embarrassing...
... about those 15 minute miles is not the fact that you can't sustain a 10-minute mile pace because you will have an asthma attack befitting one of the Nerds from Nerds.
Nor is it the goofy headband you choose to wear that you don't soak with even a speck of sweat because you weren't breaking one.
It's not even the fact that you busted straight through the a** of your favorite short jeans en route to the gym. For this you blame the nice Russian ladies at the laundromat-- you usually do your own -- for roasting them at too high a heat. It had to be that.
No, it is the line of speedwalking witnesses that forms at rush hour ... men and women all watching you, at 33, speedwalking as though you are 83 on Venice Beach wearing a leopard print one-piece and bedazzled shades and smiling through it all, gold tooth glinting in the sun.
Yes. Speedwalking. Bite me. I feel better now.
1.97 miles (!!)
15 minutes apiece
like 12 calories burned
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Comments
Really?? People watch you when you workout on the treadmill?? odd.
Submitted by ADRIANA on 02.26.10 at 10:39.
i used to be paranoid that people were watching me on the treadmill. now i just don't care.
Submitted by starry04 on 02.26.10 at 10:56.
leopard print and bedazzled shades are cool so just rock your bad self like one of those old ladies. ... and I'm sure it's sure than 12 calories ...although I know the feeling. sigh.
Submitted by Butwhatifido on 02.26.10 at 12:16.
@A: The way my gym is set up is such that a long queue of would-be treadmill runners forms waiting for those on the machines to finish. I'm not the only one being examined.
@S I totally don't care, either, but can be susceptible to writerly hyperbole.
@B Being old is going to rule.
Submitted by alexvb on 02.26.10 at 01:47.
Up until last week I was running a 15 minute mile. We ran a race and there was one lady ahead of us, walking, not even speedwalking, really, and we never passed her. Over the course of the whole race (2.6 miles). We are trying to speed up; not that a 13-minute mile is anything to be proud of...
Submitted by whatodds on 02.28.10 at 12:45.
You need my husband's t-shirt. The one that says:
KEEP STARING. I MIGHT DO A TRICK.
I am a firm believer in giving gawkers something to gawk at. So you just go on with your bad self. And I dare you to rock a leopard-print thong.
Submitted by 100Pounds on 02.28.10 at 06:08.