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trophy wife training

Sass hula hoops in Kmart

Yes, Friday was trophy wife training with Sass. It all began when I woke up very decadently, totally naked in my satin sheets. I sauntered to Crunch USQ where msh258 & Sass had been working out already for over an hour. I had an imminent hair appointment, so I deigned to put in 20 minutes on the elliptical and the rower. The whole time all I talked about was sandwiches. Sandwiches! If you ever ask me what I want for lunch, I always want sandwiches. I'm obsessed with sandwiches. Yes, Crunch, you should feel lucky that i graced you with my presence on Friday. On the way to my appointment with my adorable Irish hairdresser, Sass & I grabbed SANDWICHES and coffee. After I emerged from the salon, a fresher, brighter, blonder me, I got a mani with Sass. We went to Kmart because we love Kmart. We bought cowboy hats and tried out the hula hoops. Sass' one-footed best was 35 seconds. Mine was 3 seconds. I wanted to buy the hula hoop because it lit up but Sass was convinced they were too small. Then we had dinner and a disco nap before ladies' night out. Sass was worried about being in a crowded bar, but please, can anything keep her down? As soon as they started playing some MJ, Sass and I hit the dance floor. She is a pro at the one-footed boogie. I did some extra fancy footwork to balance out her sexy stationary moves. Then something happened and Lord knows what it was but whatever I did it was not good because I was hungover ALL OF SATURDAY. Seriously. I woke up at 9pm, having already missed the fireworks and the BBQ I was supposed to go to with Sass. So my Fourth was a giant FAIL. Happy Birthday America! I'm sorry I slept through your birthday party. General Eating for last week: Shrimp/Tomato/Brocolli/Onion/Carrot stir fry. I am so lucky to be married to myself.