Social Workout

Poet Laureate

Spotted at Fort Greene Park: Archie Comics Bully or MacGyver Workout Machine?

At Fort Greene Park, incapacitated by a stomach full of salmon quiche and mimosas, teetering between napping and amiable chatter. It's 2pm, and the sunny, cool day is like the season’s gift to students: a final, blissful Sunday to romp through the world before school starts and they're once again manacled to schedules, homework, and school lunches. For me, it’s a peaceful day with friends that’ll unroll into a workless labor day Monday, until one of my friends squawks in astonishment: “Is that guy squatting his girlfriend???”

New York

Poet Laureate

Down With Moobs

At Rehoboth beach this weekend, I had the chance to soak up some sun, crack open a couple of crab legs, rediscover the intestinal destruction that is butter dipping sauce, and skip in the sand like I was mentally-channeling/chasing a bikini-clad, beach-going Dorothy. Unfortunately, the ratio of varicose-mapped bodies and jiggly puffs to “fun and fits” was about 17 to 1. (Yes, I counted. C’mon Amurrica!) The WORST, though, was this one fairly normally looking bloke chilling beneath an umbrella, who stood up suddenly and had moobs dangling so low they grazed his waistline, like well-used udders brushing the grass.

Poet Laureate

Plastic Surgery is Good for Your Esteem

In a world where Heidi Montag can get sick of her ballooned G cup while worrying the rumored sex tape of her might feature her pre-under-the-knife body, or where Jennifer Anniston isn’t the cover girl you think she is (or is she?) it comes as no surprise that the New York Times can report that cosmetic surgery boosts your self esteem. I guess the surprise comes when you realize the article is about an eighteen-year-old girl Kristen who got boobs for a graduation gift.

Poet Laureate

Can Women Coach Football?

If you don't know, Natalie Randolph is the football coach at Coolidge High School in D.C. Just days before practice started, her start quarterback transferred to Coolidge's rival Dunbar High School, with little or no explanation--his parents graduated from there, so what?-- and thus heaps of media attention and suspicion.

Now, I know this is a very "power-woman" friendly site, and I suspect I'm counted among the "you go girl" populace. But just the idea of Natalie Randolph and her position made me think--screw the quarterback transfer article--so I'm going to throw this question out there, and see who bites.

Other Places

Poet Laureate

Summer Slacker

I’ve been rather quiet this week, partially due to my workload, partially due to a dose of summer laziness. There’s something about June that seeps into my bones, invoking a time in my life when I spent most days reinventing Ramen noodle recipes, watching Star Wars, and biking miles to mumble at the girl working the shaved ice shack. I feel like Summer is a time of rest and reinvention, hearkening to those school days when the geeky kid in Coke bottle glasses disappeared in May, only to return as a lanky hunk with contacts in August. The question is: how will I reinvent myself this year?

Gym Poet

Fat Pride

"Fat pride" is a movement. I learned this from an article debating the severe weight discrimination displayed in Pixar’s WALL-E.  Apparently, the big anti-obesity crusade at the moment is comparable, for some, "with the quest for the perfect body by the eugenics movement in Nazi Germany." People are using weight as "a proxy for health and morality,"  says Sanda Solovay, a "fat discrimination" lawyer.  

Now, let me say, as an ex-fatty, that I'm all for self-acceptance, and I believe the value of community for esteem-building is astronomically important, but I'm dubious about these "fat-ivists."

Poet Laureate

The Pilates Olympics Involved Boiled Eggs and Dixie Cups

My Pilates experiences have all been horrible: Sweaty, dark classrooms populated by scowling, grunting women and lead by teachers who neither explained positions or adjusted students. I’ve walked out of every class. Yet, somehow, Saturday afternoon I found myself exiting Grand Central, negotiating the tourist gaggle, and looking for Pilates on Fifth to report on “The Pilates Olympics.” Think of it like American Idol meets Dancing with the Stars, but replace obligatory Brits with Lululemon pants and the audience is a scruffy blogger and an adorable, older gentleman there hootin’ and hollerin’ and supporting his wife. While wearing American flag shorts.

Poet Laureate

Mount Everest Debate: Physical Feats vs. Age

When I was 13 and a half years old, I was already shaving, stood at roughly 5’ 10”, could run a half mile in 2 minutes flat, and could bench my weight.  They grow ‘em big in Texas… I also hung around the Dungeons and Dragons crowd, played clarinet (first chair baby!) and was already writing contest-winning poems. There were a lot of things on my mind: The cute flautist from band camp, Mario Kart, the next off-ice hockey game. But Mt. Everest didn't make the list. And that's, apparently, where Jordan Romero and I differ. You’ve all heard about him, the 13-year old boy trying to reach the planet’s highest summit, and it’s time to weigh in: Should 13-year-olds do stuff like climb Everest?

Poet Laureate

The High Cost of Fitness

When I left Crunch for a low-cost New York City Parks and Rec. gym I was told by one of their reps, somewhat maniacally, I’d be getting exactly what I paid for…which, at 75 bucks a year for gym access across New York sounded pretty frickin’ sweet. At Crunch, I was paying over a thousand dollars a year to lift weights, take the occasional yoga class, and, in a villainous method of mixed messages, watch The Biggest Loser or The Food Network while on the treadmill. I haven’t joined the New York gym yet, but I have looked into other gyms, and I'm seriously riled by the complete and total absence of pricing info available for chain gyms. Here's why I find it so irritating: 

Poet Laureate

Confessions from an Ex Fat Kid

Where I grew up, “healthy eating” was a salad drowning in ranch. It was clean your damn plate and don’t go for seconds. It was a ten-year-old chugging Slim Fast shakes and watching, with eyes watery and wide, as thin kids gorged themselves on snack machine lunches. It was, in short, uninformed. Fellow children’s lit enthusiast theearthlaughs brought this to my attention when she asked in this post: What’s a good children’s fitness book? I was baffled. And that’s saying something, since I used to run the children’s section in a Houston Barnes & Nobles. Well, I did some research, and found…