Social Workout

Naked Power

The Goldman Sachs Steam Room: Where the Big Deals Don't Happen

According to the old trope, all the important business happens in the locker room. That's where the boys hang out, steaming away half naked, with endorphins jangling, ready to commit serious capital. Well, if there's still any truth to the saying in this era of co-ed executive teams, private trainers and home gyms, then you might wonder which locker room today attracts the big swinging, um, power brokers. The Racquet and Tennis Club on Park Avenue, you say? Too obscurely WASPy. The Reebok Sports Club in midtown? All media glitz, no real capital. David Barton Chelsea? Come on, the Gays are not yet that powerful. What's that leave? Well, how about the new 54,000 square foot gym at 200 West Street, i.e. the in-house gym deep inside the worldwide headquarters of Goldman Sachs?

After a few months of sleuthing, our sources finally penetrated the inner sanctum of the most powerful bank on the planet. They attempted to blend in, while scanning the joint for unrepentant derivatives traders pumping themselves up with kettlebells to sell short some small European country. They examined the spin studio for signs of German electronica and thrash metal, and they spent long hours in the steam room waiting to hear something worthy of mention. The upshot?

Sweaty Bosses

The Pitfalls of the Office Gym

One potential pitfall of the office gym: Dwight Shrute taking over spin class. But the much more common problem: Convenience, with a serious side of colleagues in shorts or worse, walking around the locker room sans shorts. Last night's Globe and Mail tells the tale of a number of now traumatized Canadian office workers who've suffered through the sight of their superiors sweating to the oldies and/or manscaping their oldies over the locker room sink. Following this introduction to office gym horrors, the G&M offers a few bits of tried and true advice for navigating workplace fitness centers:

Gym Moments

Rahm Emanuel Favors Naked Locker Room Showdowns

A scene at the congressional gym:

I’m sitting there showering, naked as a jay bird, and here comes Rahm Emanuel, not even with a towel wrapped around his tush, poking his finger in my chest, yelling at me because I wasn’t going to vote for the president’s budget. Do you know how awkward it is to have a political argument with a naked man?

— Representative Eric Massa (D-NY) whose resignation in the wake of misconduct allegations took effect yesterday at 5 p.m., speaking on his radio show earlier this week (via Reuters).