David Barton Gym
Today's free workout: Ridiculously hard "Liquid Yoga" class followed by "Ab Attack" taught by a diminutive woman in her 50s with crazy washboard abs, both at David Barton Gym, Astor Place. And to make it a triple-threat, instead of taking the subway there, I tried to burn a few more calories by undertaking a pedestrian-dodging run to the gym from Times Square.
Columbia has this thing called a "major writing requirement." It's like, our law school thesis. I have to present it in class in 5 days. I don't even have a topic yet. I'm already completely f***ed, so I figured one more day of blowing off responsibility wouldn't hurt. Enter, the world's longest workout. Let's start with the run. Running in Times Square is...well, interesting. It's like Frogger meets bumper cars meets human dodgeball. Japanese tourists don't walk in a straight line (also of note, in Japan people pass each other on the left, which makes navigating high speed interactions pretty tricky). Cabs don't stop on red. Tour bus hawkers harass you even when you're going at a full gallop. After tripping over a couple of said tourists and almost getting run over, I developed a few tricks of the trade.More...
The editor-in-chief of Women's Health is out with a new book: Look Better Naked. First question, how they're going to avoid getting sued since "Look Better Naked" has been the David Barton Gym slogan since 1992. Next, you might imagine from the title that this is just your typical diet book, built on the premise that your ass is currently horrifying and something must be done to shrink, melt, blast, or tighten it. But no, the press release emphatically declares: "This is NOT your typical diet or nutrition book—Look Better Naked focuses equally on the mental and physical components of exuding confidence such as body image and the importance of self-esteem." I see. Whatever would have made me think otherwise? Maybe just the title. Also the cover. Also every verb on the book's promotional website. Just sayin.
Today's free workout: spinning at David Barton Gym, Astor Place, courtesy of a free week pass. Here's an example of when changing your mind at the last minute is a really, really bad idea. I thought I was going to Pilates. I dressed for Pilates. But last minute, I decided Pilates was for wusses, and I needed to sweat a little. No shoes? No problem. "It's a stationary bike, dummy!" I told myself. "Your feet will be strapped in and won't even be moving. You could be wearing stilettos, and it wouldn't matter."
WRONG. OMG, So Wrong.More...
This week, Lorenzo Martone, fiancé of designer Marc Jacobs, told New York Magazine how they met. Both were patrons of the trendy Paris gym L’Usine Opéra (NYMag describes it as "the David Barton of Paris"). As the mag explains:
"One day at L’Usine Opéra, he and Jacobs...were running on neighboring treadmills. Martone invited Jacobs to go running with some friends in the Jardin du Luxembourg. 'He never actually came,' Martone says. 'But we kept in touch, saying hi.'"
And that, friends, is apparently how it's done.
Most yoga studios talk about well-being, peace, or creativity. Not David Barton. For their yoga, they promise "A huge increase in sexual energy." Having only been once, I can't verify that sweeping claim. But I can verify that Liquid Yoga, their fast-paced vinyasa class, is a total turn-on. A few of the contributing factors: