Social Workout

Overheard

Spin Class Pregnancy Confusion

The scene: Friday afternoon spin class. The players: Spin Instructor; Whackadoo

Instructor: Is anyone new, injured, or pregnant?
Whackadoo (sitting front and center in gray cotton biker shorts and a sports bra): I'm new.

Instructor gets off bike and proceeds to adjust Whackadoo's bike for her and tell her about hand positioning.  A few minutes pass and class begins warm-up.

Instructor: Increase resistance to moderate, this will feel like your bike as a kid before you had gears.
Whackadoo: What if I'm pregnant?
Instructor: Are you pregnant?
Whackadoo: I don't know.

New York

Overheard

Well, That's One Way To Do It

Setting: Running class, girl in front of me discussing her weekend run with her boyfriend.

Girl: Then he just stopped running. He said, "This isn't working" and ran away. He broke up with me then ran away!

(Sounds of shock and dismay come from running coach)

Girl: Should I call him?

Overheard

Run For Your Life

In the park this week, I heard the following extreme motivational speech: 

Personal Trainer to client: Moving up to a sprint...run!
Personal Trainer: Fast, sprint. Like you're running away from a killer.
Personal Trainer: Okay, now slow it down.

New York

Overheard

Grossness Aside, You Pay How Much?

The scene: Lockeroom. Awkward post-shower naked moment between friends.

Dirty Girl: I refuse to wipe down those nasty machines. I pay $50 a month to be here, and they have cleaning people for that.
Less Dirty Friend: You only pay $50 a month?!

Overheard

On Running and Medication

Overheard by a reader at midtown NYC hair salon... ~ The Eds.

Client: Are you still running? 
Male Stylist: I knew you were going to ask me that question. No. 
Client: ...because you're doing something else?
Male Stylist: No. You know what happened? I've got high blood pressure. I come from a long line of thin, sinewy men that drop dead of a heart attack in their 50s. So, I've started taking medication. 
Client: That's not going to happen to you! So, you can't run because of the risk of heart attack? Or is it the medication? 
Male Stylist: Actually, there aren't any side effects. The only side effect is that my blood pressure is fine now. So, I don't run any more. I used to run because I didn't want to die. Now the medication has taken care of the problem. 

Overheard

Lady, It's Called a Dog

The locker room is a magical place full of wisdom and clever advice on animal rearing.

Otherwise seemingly normal lady: I think I'm going to get a cat.
Friend: Awwww.
Otherwise seemingly normal lady: I've heard that pets are really motivating because you have to get up and walk them and play with them and stuff.
Friend: They are, you should totally get a cat leash and walk around the park with it. Cats need exercise.
Otherwise seemingly normal lady: They do! Thank you.

Overheard

The Talk and Climb

Man, finishing phone call, walks into office.

Woman: You seem out of breath.

Man (with enthusiasm): I do some of my best phone calling in stairwells!

Okay, again, it was Oliver. But reminder, overhear something funny at the gym, on the running path, in yoga class — we want to know! Post it, subject line: Overheard. 

Overheard

The Locker Room "Can You Hear Me Now"

My friend E. reports from her gym in Louisiana...

Overheard in the gym locker room shower (over the sound of running water):  No, no, that's fine. Not busy. Go ahead.... Oh yeah? Well...sorry. It may not be the best connection because I'm in the shower. No really, it's fine....oh...okay...bye.

Overheard

The Wave of the Future For Our Bodies?

The winner of this week's "Embarrassing-Amusing-Scintillating Overheard at the Gym" contest: prairieportia, who eavesdropped quite nicely on the following after her speed workout on the mall:

Homeless-looking man with a bunch of five-gallon buckets and a frisbee talking to bicycle-mounted Capitol cops: "So, just tell them to pull it down over their faces and see what happens. See how they like it. It's the wave of the future for our bodies. We CAN get our bodies in shape."

Our noble runner-up: What trainers say when pole dancers scream at the gym. Overhear something funny at the gym, on the running path, in yoga class? Post it! Subject line: "Overheard: [...snippet of choice...]"

Overheard

Headstand Boobs

[As reported by a reader in Big Sky, Montana. True story. ~The Eds.]

Woman: "I had a rough yoga class this morning

Guy Friend: "Really?"

Woman: "The teacher had a boob job. What's up with that? First, she gives this lame sermon. I mean, I'm ok with yoga teachers preaching a little. Sometimes it's good, and sometimes it isn't, but I want to do the yoga so I just sit through it. What she said was really cliché and lame though, and I'm, like, whatever, and just noticing her fake boobs. And, of course, she already has this killer body."

Guy Friend: "Were you upset because she had a better body than you, or that she had no integrity? You have a great body by the way."

Woman: "Both. And then she was also the type that has to demonstrate every pose. So we have to gather around to watch her lift up into a perfect headstand. Her breasts looked exatly the same right side up as upside down. C'mon, I know what gravity does to breasts. So, I'm totally distracted, and not centered, and not thinking yogic thoughts about her. But then I think, maybe she has a good reason for the boob job. Maybe she had breast cancer, and she had to get new breasts. But I don't think so."

Guy Friend: "I'm sorry."