Blessed Be the Fluggers
Yesterday, as I was skimming the front page, I discovered this rather jarring chart that more or less advertises the average number of minutes bloggers for the site work out daily... at least since July 27th or something. The lowest hovers around 30 minutes, the highest a solid 5 hours daily, which means the median is somewhere around 2 hours and 45 minutes a day. For ten days straight. (hooray for comment fodder! and math!) As I commented on the post, "BULLSHIT," mainly because, oh, iunno, professional athletes don't work out that much, for starters, and, oh yeah, it's retardedly terrible for you. BUT. I appreciate it all the same, because I think I know what's going on, and have created a new word to celebrate those of you packing the minutes on, so to speak, to guide us out of this ridiculously over ambitious challenge.
I dub those of you fluffing up your blogs to be FLUGGERS from here on. Blessed be the fluggers.
A flugger knows what working out is all about. Got to run down the street to restock on salted lard? 10 minutes, 2 if you add the strain of lugging a bucket of salted fat back to the homestead. Got laundry to do? 3 hours, because, shit, you haven't done laundry in 7 weeks, which is like 6 loads, and you have to carry that 3.7 blocks to the laundromat, and then sit there, and it's, like, totally hot as a sauna in there, so you're sweating, and, oh yeah, the Polish hag hogging the dryers is really getting your heart rate up. Listening to a good song at work? Tapping your feet is like walking, if you're Christopher Reeves, and who, at one point, didn't want to be like him?
So go on, fluggers, and flug it up! Our smiles are beaming and genuine, our applause is sincere as you count the minutes changing/showering at the gym, waiting for equipment, or, iunno, or count the number steps to the bathroom.
-MM
- Mr. Mohawk's blog
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Comments
well...this challenge isn't really about workout minutes, but about activity minutes...and if that means i can count the 20 minutes of my commute in the morning, or the lunch-time walk...you better believe i will! and no...i don't count bathroom breaks!
now...how you get to the numbers the top 2 peeps are showing, i still don't know. i thought i squeezed as much activity as i could into a day given that i work full-time! ;-)
Submitted by msh258 on 08.06.10 at 09:17.
MSH has a point - I legitimately bike to-and-from work every day - 30 minutes - I walk my dog at least that again every day - add on a real 90 minute workout... it does add up. Also – that’s just one week's numbers. Anyone could have ONE week like that. I hit those types of numbers the two weeks I was biking across Spain :)
Submitted by Butwhatifido on 08.06.10 at 09:26.
love this!
@butwhat, yes 30 minutes biking to work and a workout is reasonable. but in one week, 5 hours/day? that's extreme!
Submitted by Fraidy on 08.06.10 at 09:32.
I think, rather than harp on people trying to work or be active out 2 hours a day, I was pointing out that working out 2-3 hours a day is an average, yo, more or less. That's cuhrazy. And you know it. Don't get your lulus in a twist.
Submitted by Mr. Mohawk on 08.06.10 at 09:47.
Does that mean I should have counted walking for miles through airports carrying my very heavy carryon? I didn't even think about that... it wasn't "intentional" it just "was." During this challenge if I walked instead of taking a cab I counted it, but the usual everyday things that can't be avoided I just did without counting... although I tell ya, those walks through international airports pulling a large and overweight suitcase and hauling a carryon was no easy feat. If we need the minutes I will go back and put those in... (what section would it be? weight lifting, walking....)
Submitted by kornflowers on 08.06.10 at 10:15.
no one's in a twist MM. you;re just fun to tease. for the record - (b/c it's your pet peeve - haha) I still don't count commuting/dog walking (especially with my slow ass dog) as a "workout" but I am MMlogging it.
@ Fraidy - you are right. extreme. mamma needs her drinking time! (although I am remembering a day not too long ago when - in and around a major work deadline - you went to the gym 3 times in one day...) :) awesome.
Submitted by Butwhatifido on 08.06.10 at 10:20.
@korn: yes, that indeed is something you should have counted. Myself? I am exceptionally talented and adept at cocking my eyebrow, an effort that engages dozens of muscles. I shall begin tallying my minutes immediately.
@butwhat: guess who's coming to, er, Phi-town? P-town? tonight??? Wanna hang out and watch me get drunk? You can get drunk too, if you like.
Submitted by Mr. Mohawk on 08.06.10 at 11:09.
hells yeah. :)
Submitted by Butwhatifido on 08.06.10 at 11:16.
@korn-those minutes should definitely count. I remember hearing someone logged minutes they held a camcorder at a graduation. so pretty much anything goes in this challenge.
@butwhat that day was about 2 weeks ago. i did take 3 classes. but all that was only 2 1/2 hours. and that was a one time thing.
Submitted by Fraidy on 08.06.10 at 04:32.
frankly, everyone, aren't we all ready to be Fluggers and get to 1,000,000???
isn't everyone ready for something new?
Submitted by sandyliz on 08.06.10 at 05:19.
Amen brother...
Submitted by killercadoogan on 08.06.10 at 07:21.
okay.... i'm goin in and countin those airport minutes...
Submitted by kornflowers on 08.09.10 at 12:18.
@mohawk - glad you've been lifting those brows... we DO need all the minutes we can get! (I think you should also add all those heavy pints you've been lifting to your lips... not an easy feat, I'm sure!)
Submitted by kornflowers on 08.09.10 at 12:19.
you know, hawk, no one starts a comment war like you do. you've been missed.
now start counting those eyebrow cocking, pint lifting, drunken emphatic gesturing minutes and END THE MMM.
Submitted by sandyliz on 08.09.10 at 01:23.