Social Workout

Shout Out to all the SW Moms

Hearts.

I've never thought that being a parent was easy. I want to make that clear. But I have to give some special love to the moms (and dads) who make time to exercise and stay active, while still caring for some tiny people.

I'm feeling the love now because I am pooped. My nephew came for a visit two days after we got back from Aruba. He stays with us quite a bit. After I moved to the city, my sister moved to Montreal, and she's a single mom, so we started taking my nephew for a month each summer so she could get a break and he could get a taste of city life. This started when he was almost six, and he's almost 12 now, and he's kind of awesome.

When he's here, I'm kind of a crazy person. I worry about everything. I worry about what he eats, what he reads. I worry he's not getting out enough, or doesn't have any friends here except the Husband and his friends, who are basically overgrown kids anyway. I make sure he gets to spend time with my in laws, who love him to pieces (because, according to my mother, I haven't spawned a grandchild). We try to coordinate his visits with my cousin's visits, because they are six months apart and basically clones. I usually take time off from work to spend time with him, and when I work the Husband usually has him because he has a job that lets him work from home when he wants to.

When I do have to work, I call for or five times a day. Has he eaten breakfast? Has he brushed his teeth? What will you do today? Did he call his mom? Did he call my mom? I feel terrible that he's here to spend time with me, and I'm at work. He's a boy and usually much happier to be with the Husband, but he is happiest when we are all together. When I do work, he asks when I will come home. Oh, the guilt.

So needless to say, I feel like a selfish asshole when I want to go to the gym. If I've been home with him all day, I don't feel so bad leaving him with his uncle for an hour, but this time I worked every day that he was here. I didn't see him for more than four hours at a time. We watched movies, got ice cream, watched the same YouTube clip over and over again until we cried, but the whole time I felt guilty for not spending more time with him, and guiltier for wanting to go to the gym.

I don't know how you moms do it. I say this in awe and with respect. I only have my nephew for a week here, a month there. He's not even technically my kid. My mommy friends say it's totally different when you have your own child, but I love this kid so much, I don't know that it could be any different. Maybe I'd be more settled into a routine, but I don't imagine this gets easier. And as they get older, you certainly don't get more free time. Between after school sports and activities, different birthday parties, school breaks, helping with homework, running errands, cleaning up the house, feeding everyone, cleaning up after them again.. Whether you work or stay at home, having a kid is hard. Most parents barely get enough sleep, let alone any free time.

But, somehow, some of you are doing it. Seriously, when do you sleep? It's exhausting, this child rearing business. Even the passive parts, like being a good example. Kids are smart and they see everything. Even if you don't think they're not paying attention or could care about your morning runs, yoga or workout dvds, they see it. Even if they prefer flat foods and refuse all things green for a while, you're still putting whole and fresh foods on their plates, and they'll come around. They are quietly soaking up the benefits of staying active and being healthy. They're better off as adults because you made the effort for yourself when they were kids.

So my hats are off to the parents who find the time to work out. And to the ones who feed their kids real food instead of ones full of things we can't pronounce. I know this is terribly mushy, but I am exhausted. And I only had to do this for six days. And he's basically a teenager, and nowhere as demanding as a toddler. Or multiples. Or three kids in two schools because they're different ages. I don't know if I could do this. Every day should be Mother's Day. And Father's Day. Just sayin'.